Before And After (Or During)

I was not, to my knowledge, born with schizophrenia.

I was diagnosed with the condition in 1995, when I was 25 years old.

I had problems as a child and teenager, particularly emotional ones. But I was deemed healthy. I lived with my family. I had friends, was active and got good grades.

It would appear that a change happened leading up to and encompassing my diagnosis. I did not seem to be the same person. My parents noticed that I had undergone a transformation.

There were different theories. Was it an issue of addiction? A spiritual crisis? Was it something a doctor could diagnose, and if so, what would be the treatment? Medicine? If so, would organic remedies be preferred or the more standard types of pills?

I can definitely understand why my parents felt this way, and why they considered putting me in treatment. I really had changed. I went from being a vibrant and connected young man to a person who was troubled, isolated and detached.


It has been hard, then, for me to convince people that I am still the same person.  But often I so very much wish I could convince people that under it all and despite it all, I am still “T.J.”– the same kid who loved them, got good grades and told puns at the table, is there and will be as long as I am alive.

As much as I am sure this is the case, I understand that it is difficult to accept, hard to believe.

And I can certainly offer no proof, only make appeals or suggestions.



Author: mystified13

Sole member of Mystified and Mister Vapor.

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